I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
