i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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