lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
