I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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