I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize