She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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