Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
