that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
