"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
