he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I need a beard to bite.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
