well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
