Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
...so i touched it.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
