You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
