Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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