"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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