we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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