their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Your cock deserves a montage
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
