I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Just high enough for therapy.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
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