she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
