what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Randomize
