Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
