Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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