I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
