Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
