Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
