I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
