is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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