its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Randomize
