We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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