This girl is more easily done than said...
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
