Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I'm determined to sit on that face.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
