I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Let's get the cat blown out
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
