lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
