I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Sponge bath it is.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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