Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
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