I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize