you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
