singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Drunk is not a location!
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
