Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Did I show you my penis last night?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
