Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
