everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
