I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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