I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Your mouth is God's brothel.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Randomize
