that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize