The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Be still, my beating vagina.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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