it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize