I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
