is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
time to smoke my breakfast
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
