im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
