Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
