So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
