kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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