Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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